By Linette Rainville
I didn’t recognize it as a “Holy Ache” at first. At the time, it just felt like heartbreak.
I had an infant in a stroller, my three-year-old in tow, and a bag of skinny jeans balanced awkwardly on top of the stroller shade. Those jeans didn’t fit my new mom body anymore, and honestly, neither did the season of life I was trying so desperately to hold together.
I walked into a thrift store hoping to trade those clothes for items my family actually needed.
But the clerk replied, “I’m sorry, that’s just not our policy. You can take your donation bag out back.”
There I stood—deer-in-the-headlights style—whispering under my breath, “But God, … you gave me this idea.”
When A YES Sprouts
Somewhere between that store door and my car door, God planted a tiny seed in my heart that grew into what I now call my Holy Ache.
Right there in the parking lot, with hot tears streaming down my face, I prayed, “Lord, somehow, some way… let me be the one to help women in situations like mine.” At the time, I had no idea that one small “yes” would eventually grow into a community outreach that now helps meet over 40,000 food, clothing, and infant needs each year.
But that’s the thing about a Holy Ache, It never comes as a full blueprint. It’s more like a breadcrumb trail God drops along your path. A persistent stirring. A burden you can’t shake. Something that makes you think, “Somebody should do something about that…”
Until suddenly you realize … that somebody might just be ME.
Tending To The Call
The Holy Ache calls you to notice something that feels broken, missing, or unjust—the single mom, the widow, the abused, the overlooked.
It’s the thing you can’t stop thinking about, praying about, or dreaming about. It’s like a pebble in your shoe; the why that makes you cry and the thing that makes you sing.
Then the Holy Spirit whispers, “Pay attention here.” So many women minimize their Holy Ache because it starts small, but God plants dreams in seed form.
How To Grow Your Holy Ache
1. Name It
What breaks your heart? What keeps bubbling up in your spirit? What do you go to bed thinking about and wake up still carrying?
2. Notice the Pattern
What burden keeps returning? Start to journal it. God often repeats what He wants us to pay attention to.
3. Next Step
Ask God. Not for the entire five-year plan, but for the next step.
4. Now Do It
Start small, but dream big. One conversation. One gathering. One act of obedience.
Because here’s what I’ve learned after years in ministry: A Holy Ache is not something we’re meant to carry alone. We need a tribe.
Modern-Day Esthers
That’s one of the reasons I love gathering women inside our Daughters United sisterhood. Our callings grow best when we are in community.
Women need spaces where they can heal, pray, build, and be reminded they are not crazy for dreaming big. Your story matters, too. That’s why I also love to spotlight modern-day Esthers on the What’s Your Story? podcast. Their stories remind us that God still uses ordinary gals with willing hearts.
I hope that today my story is confirmation for you, letting you know that what’s tugging on your heart isn’t random. It’s holy. And I pray that you, like Queen Esther, can hear the Lord echo this in your spirit: “For such a time as this” (Esther 4:14).
So don’t ignore your ache. Because the very thing that breaks your heart may be God’s clue to your calling. And, precious friend, you don’t have to start big. You just have to start.
Linette Rainville, founder of Daughters United, is an award-winning author, speaker, podcast host, and ministry mentor who loves helping women grow God-sized dreams, ministries, and missions from the ground up. Her greatest joy is cheering women on to START LITTLE and DREAM BIG FOR JESUS. www.StartLittleDreamBig.com.
