By Stacy Sanchez
Stacy hit the ground—not on her knees, but flat on her face.
Her grandson’s latest violent outburst had pushed the family past their breaking point.
Gasping for air in her bedroom, she cried out to God through tears that wouldn’t stop.
“God, I can’t breathe. Help me breathe.”
The response came gently: “Breathe to the rhythm of My love.”
The Dreams That Died on the Doorstep
This wasn’t the retirement Stacy Sanchez had envisioned.
After decades of raising children, she and her husband had finally reached empty nest status. Then DCS dropped her grandson on their doorstep. Her daughter had neglected and abused him.
This traumatized child became Stacy’s responsibility overnight—along with his explosive reactions and violent episodes. Everything stopped. The writing dreams. The travel plans. The peaceful retirement they’d earned.
Stacy joined a hidden population of 2.7 million grandparents across America who are raising their grandchildren.
When Your Body Betrays Your Heart
The exhaustion was crushing.
Trauma specialist Dr. Roderick Logan explained: “One of the biggest reasons why grandparents struggle is aging. Genetically, you’re not the same when you are 65 as you were when you were 25.”
Now add the stress of caring for traumatized children. The collision is devastating.
First Responder Without the Badge
“Grandparents parenting again are first responders,” Dr. Logan said.
“They’re rescuing children, providing first-level care, often with trauma.”
But unlike professionals, Stacy had no training, no support. Eventually, she made the heartbreaking decision to send her grandson to a treatment facility.
“I have hope, but it’s a different kind,” she explains. “He’s absolutely your’s, God.”
Learning to Put On Your Own Oxygen Mask
Professional counseling became Stacy’s lifeline.
Dr. Logan’s words: “Before I can attend to my grandchild’s needs, I have to attend to my needs because I can’t give them what I don’t have.”
Self-care wasn’t selfish— it was survival.
What You Can Do Starting Today
Through her journey, Stacy shares steps grandparents can take:
• Start with yourself first. Practice self-awareness and self-compassion.
• Find your peers. People who hear your struggles without judgment.
• Don’t parent alone. Learn skills and be satisfied with your best.
Remember you’re a first responder providing emergency care.
Moving Forward in the Dark
Today, Stacy speaks to other grandparents in similar situations.
Her message: “I get it. You are exhausted. It’s okay to rest. It’s okay to take care of you.” That desperate moment on her bedroom floor wasn’t the end of her story. It was, as God whispered, moving forward—one breath at a time, one surrendered hope at a time.
For the 2.7 million grandparents walking this hidden journey: You’re not failing when you can’t handle everything alone. Start where you are. Breathe to the rhythm of His love. Reach out. You’re moving forward.
Join Stacy’s Facebook Community Grandparents Raising Grandkids: Parenting … Again?!!! for support and resources.
